depression

Breaking through the Barriers of Teenage Communication

Leave a comment   , , , , , , , ,
Share Button
parenting

(Photo Credit: Shutterstock)

By Alicia Cox, MA, AMFT

Being a teenager can be very confusing and emotional at times. This can make it difficult for a parent to understand how to approach their teen and how to develop a strong bond with them through this stage of their life. There are several factors you should keep in mind when connecting with your teenager to help make sure you are creating a space that is empathetic and understanding.

As we develop, we have several psycho-social milestones we are expected to complete at by the end of each life stage. The milestone that teenagers are trying to develop is their individual identity. Teenagers are beginning to separate their identity from the identity of their family. Friends begin to have a larger influence on them than their parents, so it is important for parents to find a balance where they are giving the teen their space, but are still available when teens need more than their friends can provide.

We know now that human brains do not fully develop until we are in our mid-twenties. The area of the brain that is still maturing through our teen years and into our mid-20’s is the prefrontal cortex. This area of the brain is responsible for executive functioning, which includes planning, attention, inhibition and working memory (process actions that are happening to you in the present moment).  This can make it much more difficult for teenagers to be organized and use self-control.

In our teen years, we also rely heavily on our amygdala for processing information about the world around us. This is the area of the brain that is responsible for our emotions. Processing information in the emotional center of the brain can cause teens to react with stronger emotions in situations where an adult may not react so strongly.

Keeping these facts in mind, here are some tips to use when trying to establish better communication between you and your teen:

  1. Create a safe space: You will want to create an environment for your teen that lets them know you are open source to talk to that is free of judgment. This may include not reacting strongly to what they are saying and holding off on giving advice unless they ask for it.
  2. Active listening: This can be as easy are nodding and saying “Uh huh” as they are speaking or repeating important points back to your teen. These are skills many therapists use. It can let your teen that you are connecting with them so they feel more open to sharing.
  3. Withhold your impulse reactions: When they admit to something that you disagree with, withhold your gut reactions as best as you can. If this means leaving the room for a couple minutes to collect your thoughts, tell your teen you need to take care of something really quick and leave the room. Come back and rejoin the conversation when you feel like you have a clear mind. Reacting impulsively can sometimes close a teen off.
  4. Make time for your teen: Being available to your teen consistently is very important in establishing a more open relationship.
  5. Give them space: It is sometimes most effective to let them approach you. Once you have put some of these skills into motion, your teen will start to know they can rely on you and will learn to come to you with any conflicts in their life. If you are really concerned and they are not coming to you, you can always ask if they are doing okay and if there is anything they want to talk about but don’t come off as pushing too hard for them to speak up. That can work against you and cause them to close off even more.
  6. Check in with yourself during the conversation: Make sure your body language isn’t giving the impression that you are closed off (arms crossed, not looking at them in the eye) or that you are holding a judgment (expression on your face when they say something that elicits an emotion).

All these tips are things that will need some rehearsal so it is important to be patient once putting this into practice. It may be helpful to practice these skills on other people in your life before using them with your teen.


References

Johnson, S. B, Blum, R. W & Gleed, J. N. (2009) Adolescent maturity and the brain: the promise and pitfalls of neuroscience research in adolescent health policy. Journal of Adolescent Health, 43 (3), 216-221.

Newman, B. M. & Newman, P. R. (2008) Development through life: a psychosocial approach. (10th ed.). Australia: Wadsworth Cengage Publishing.

Sather, R. & Shelat, A. Understanding the teen brain. University of Rochester Medical Center Health Encyclopedia. Retrieved from: https://www.urmc.rochester.edu/encyclopedia/

Share Button
Share Button


The Healing Power of Sound Intensive Meditation Experience

Leave a comment   , , , , , , , , , ,
Share Button

Crystal Singing Bowls Mind/Body Connection

Healing Pathways is very excited to bring you the crystal bowls to bring balance to your mind, body, and spirit. The bowls are pure crystal and tuned to specific frequencies and chakras to enhance the meditator’s experience, taking you deeper into meditation. Most ancient cultures used the magical power of sound to heal and to bring the body back into resonant balance. Regardless of your level of meditation practice, the crystal bowls will assist you in reducing stress, anxiety, and pain, promote happiness, peace of mind, and help you hear the music of your life-purpose.

Come and learn to open up to your deeper wise self while resonating with the healing sounds of the crystal bowls. Regardless of your level of meditation practice you will be able to experience a richer grounding, healing and/or connection to your higher source. Mindful practitioners of all levels are welcome to come and enjoy this unique meditative experience. Feel free to bring a blanket and pillow for the meditation portion of the program.

Given her background in evidenced-based healing models, Dr. Leona Kashersky is presenting this ancient practice of crystal singing bowls, chakral system theory, rhythm and mantra meditation with the modern principles of EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing). This fusion of past, present and future is sure to enhance your inner work of integrating your heart and mind at a serene location provided by Healing Pathways.

Stay Tuned! Next event date to be posted soon!

For registration call: 916-595-7233
Email soundhealinghpps@gmail.com for registration details
Cost $140 3 hour instruction and experiential didactic.

 

Share Button
Share Button


Mental Health Access and Equality: 3 Steps to Freedom!

Leave a comment   , , , , , , , , ,
Share Button
parenting

(Photo Credit: Shutterstock)

By Dr. Leona Kashersky, PsyD

According to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, as many as one in five Americans will experience a mental health issue at some point in their lives. This report is likely an underestimation of how many Americans experience mental health challenges during a lifetime. Of the nearly 60 million Americans who experience mental health concerns each year, many will never seek treatment for a variety of reasons including social stigma, cultural norms, and lack of access. In fact, a recent report published in the journal Psychological Science and the Public Interest found that an estimated 40% of individuals with serious mental health concerns either never receive care or start an intervention program without completing it.

The stigma surrounding mental health issues can be a significant barrier to care. Unfortunately, many people unknowingly contribute to the stigma simply with their everyday language choices. A poor choice of words not only stigmatizes, stereotypes, and creates unrealistic assumptions about certain people, but also can trivialize serious mental health conditions and their accompanying experience. As we move forward into a more enlightened future where mental health access and needs are considered just as normal and standard as the need to address a flu or more chronic physical health challenges, let’s dream of this brighter and more hopeful world together here!

In this new and more beautiful world our hearts know is possible, we would accept mental health hygiene and seeing professionals as part of living a normal and healthy life. Acknowledging and discussing symptoms wouldn’t be secretive or shame-based. Just as our communities gather to support those with physical illness, we would gather to do the same for those with depression, anxiety, and neurological differences. We would have more open dialogue about how this gathering would look different because the needs of these individuals are different than those suffering from flu or other chronic physical health challenges. This more beautiful world would allow us to come together armed with education and support to face life’s most challenging mental health setbacks without the shame and judgement we often face in our world today.

In this more beautiful world our health plans would adequately cover inpatient and partial hospitalization, intensive outpatient, and outpatient programs. All of us would have access to appropriate levels of care when we need it. Communities and families would know how to embrace and integrate individuals who are struggling with appropriate and supportive boundaries. Substance abuse treatment would be easy to access and affordable, saving countless lives. If we really want this beautiful new world, we can begin this journey by taking 3 simple steps.

  1. Accept what is! All of us need mental health maintenance. All of us grieve. All of us suffer. It IS the human condition. Let’s accept it and help each other.
  2. Suspend judgement! Judging ourselves or others in their mental suffering only serves to extend the duration of suffering. LET GO of the shoulds and other criticisms.
  3. Dream of the life you want and believe it is possible! Imagine how you will feel when this happens. Allow yourself to experience the full emotion and somatic sensation of those emotions. Allow your mind to fully appreciate all that is there for you.

These steps will allow you to magnetize to your ‘More Beautiful World’ tribe. This community will be the seeds to this more beautiful world in our hearts we all know is possible. These roots are already growing and taking hold, so let’s keep dreaming together. We are manifesting our hearts desire and creating a new reality together!


References

Corrigan, Patrick. (September 4, 2014). Stigma as a Barrier to Mental Health Care. Association for Psychological Science. Retrieved from: http://www.psychologicalscience.org/index.php/news/releases/stigma-as-a-barrier-to-mental-health-car.html

Mental Health America. Mental Health Information. Retrieved from: http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/mental-health-information

Eisenstein, Charles. (November 5, 2013). The More Beautiful World Our Hearts Know is Possible. North Atlantic Books.

Share Button
Share Button


World Sickness and the Thirst for God

Leave a comment   , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Share Button

World Sickness image

By Nicolina Santoro, MA, IMF 77972

Once upon a time, in the vast kingdom of the helping professions, there lived a therapist whose thirst for knowledge and desire to aid in the process of personal and interpersonal change was unrivaled in all the land. This therapist had taken it upon herself to rewrite the story of her own history in a manner that changes the context of painful past experiences from blockages into tools that create a larger understanding and empathy for those she has chosen to serve in her work.

This constantly evolving therapist became immersed in theory and work of great minds such as Carl Rogers and William James. Realizing that human potential is vast, she wanted to understand how important stories and fairy tales were to constructing the memories that colored the landscape of reality, a reality that seemed to have the power to dictate how people see themselves and live their lives.

These dominant fairy tales permeate the fabric of our perceptions which also bump up against the lives of others we come into contact with out in the world. Personal narratives or “life styles” are filled with characters that are archetypal in nature, influencing us to play out repetitive sequences in life. These characters tend to take on the personas of stereotypical themes that are reinforced by learning them at a young age, or by the social referencing effect of our dominant culture.

William James calls the mental fatigue effect of living in an environment laden with unrealistic scenarios or fairy tales “world sickness.” It appears as though living in a world dominated by stereotypes and fairy tales could be implicated in the aggravation of many types of mental health issues.

How can we address the fatigue, depression, anxiety, and thought distortions that world sickness creates and impacts?

Let’s start with being gentle with ourselves. When we imagine a supreme spiritual being, the embodiment of certain characteristics seems to be present across many cultures. Some of these characteristics include unconditional love (a love that exists beyond judgment), a superconscious presence that never dissipates or abandons, and the ability to create out of seemingly thin air. For the scientists who have a different path, god could also be described as the picture of what we theorize as the highest human potential. We have the potential to express this in our own reality by living our lives in accordance to our deepest and strongest values while moving away from comparing ourselves to the unrealistic standards or “fairy tales” woven into the fabric of our society, loving ourselves and others through the lens of acceptance and vulnerability, a gentler version of happily ever after.


References

James. W. (1902). The Varieties of Religious Experience: A Study on Human Nature. Longmans, Green & Co. London, UK.

Miller, W.R. (2006). Integrating Spirituality into Treatment: Resources for Practitioners. Washington: American Psychological Association.

Share Button
Share Button